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  • Re: Important Notices

    Originally posted by Mezlo View Post
    My point / advice is to not let her dictate when you can do what you enjoy doing. You should have some say in that yourself. This is coming from a happily married man, not someone that is single and doesn't understand the give and take involved in a successful relationship. The bet you made with her and lost that kept you from playing for 2 weeks straight comes to mind...

    And children (which you don't have) will change my situation 100%. But I enjoy playing D&D so I'll be able to continue, I will just have to watch the baby for some other 4-5 hour period or so on the weekend allowing her to do what she wants to do. See, that's the give and take I was referring to.
    She doesn't dictate anything about my life. We have work schedules that prevent us from seeing one another 5 days of the week. Saturday and Sunday are the only days I get to see her (awake). That I use a large chunk of such a limited time to play D&D with you all is more of a gesture to you. She holds the calendar of events that we have obligation to. I have soccer games for my sister that I never miss, football games for my brother that I never miss, birthdays and holidays that we push to the weekends so that we can attend them and a veritable plethora of chores and errands to run when we have a spare moment. Said calendar is in her possession and I pay little attention to it until she reminds me. Neither one of us has much of any time to ourselves and thanks to the aforementioned crazy and conflicting work schedules, we like to spend the time we mutually have off, together. Don't lecture me on healthy relationships.

    As for the bet that you like to bring up so often as an example of just how "whipped" I am, the whole arrangement was my idea. I made a bet, where my winning terms were nothing more than "ha, I told you" and hers was "no D&D for 2 weeks". I agreed to the terms, I lost, and I held to my word and carried out the sentence. How is that being controlled? We do that all the time and she loses just as often as I do.

    As for children, I was 18 when my brother was born, 19 when my sister was. I played 3rd parent to them during their entire life to date. I even left college during my junior year to alleviate my parents of the financial burden of my student loans so that they could afford to send the 2 of them to private schools where they could get the best educations available to them. I'm well aware of the responsibilities of a parent (outside of the financial obligations). I dare say I have far more experience in this than you do. I don't have to lecture you, I'm sure you're getting more than enough of that from your friends and family. However, in the off chance that your family doesn't care or you don't have friends: You'll find that children don't cater to your schedule, you cater to theirs. Just because it's your wife's "turn" to watch them doesn't mean she'll be rested enough to undertake the task. You have a lot of learning to do still. I wish you all the luck in the world as I do any parent. The things you like and enjoy don't matter nearly as much after kids (and shouldn't). What matters are the kids themselves. The sooner you learn that and prioritize them over yourself, the better. I would not only understand if you stopped D&D when yours is born, but I would encourage it. At least until the first year is over. Use your free time to rest and re-cooperate.

    Your presumption (joking or not) to know how my week's activities are designated is not only misinformed, but unwanted advice from someone whose idea of a fun day off involves drinking heavily.

    Don't claim to understand someone based on tidbits of information that you've garnished from casual interactions with them.

    - Wendy and I have spent 6 happy years virtually inseparable while balancing our limited time together with social obligations, errands, work and the occasional extracurricular activity such as D&D when there's sufficient time for it.

    - I've sacrificed more of my life for my brother and sister than you could possibly hope to sacrifice for your own child in the first 10 years of his/her life.

    I wouldn't trade neither circumstance for the world.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Have you not noticed that from Saturday to Monday, you never see me post on the forum? I don't waste any of my time off with this site unless I have to... or unless something is just plain too funny not to share.


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    • Re: Important Notices

      Originally posted by cidbahamut
      I thought Armando had family visiting him this weekend.
      You're correct. In fact, you've kept track of the date better than I have - I incorrectly stated that was last weekend a page or two back. Super derp.

      It's not a definitive "no", but I can't make any guarantees. They did have plans to visit a friend of my dad's who's in the hospital, but it's likely they'll do that during the week so they can spend more time with me on the weekend. Still, there's only so much I can actively do with my parents (as opposed to simply being around them), so maybe I'll have a chance to play.
      Originally posted by Yygdrasil
      She doesn't dictate anything about my life. We have work schedules that prevent us from seeing one another 5 days of the week. Saturday and Sunday are the only days I get to see her (awake).
      I feel ya. That's the state of my relationship too.

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      • Re: Important Notices

        Originally posted by Yygdrasil View Post
        As for children, I was 18 when my brother was born, 19 when my sister was. I played 3rd parent to them during their entire life to date. I even left college during my junior year to alleviate my parents of the financial burden of my student loans so that they could afford to send the 2 of them to private schools where they could get the best educations available to them. I'm well aware of the responsibilities of a parent (outside of the financial obligations). I dare say I have far more experience in this than you do. I don't have to lecture you, I'm sure you're getting more than enough of that from your friends and family. However, in the off chance that your family doesn't care or you don't have friends: You'll find that children don't cater to your schedule, you cater to theirs. Just because it's your wife's "turn" to watch them doesn't mean she'll be rested enough to undertake the task. You have a lot of learning to do still. I wish you all the luck in the world as I do any parent. The things you like and enjoy don't matter nearly as much after kids (and shouldn't). What matters are the kids themselves. The sooner you learn that and prioritize them over yourself, the better. I would not only understand if you stopped D&D when yours is born, but I would encourage it. At least until the first year is over. Use your free time to rest and re-cooperate.
        Originally posted by Yygdrasil View Post
        - I've sacrificed more of my life for my brother and sister than you could possibly hope to sacrifice for your own child in the first 10 years of his/her life.

        I wouldn't trade neither circumstance for the world.

        - - - Updated - - -

        Have you not noticed that from Saturday to Monday, you never see me post on the forum? I don't waste any of my time off with this site unless I have to... or unless something is just plain too funny not to share.
        Adding to this, I was 11 when my youngest sister was born and have been playing third parent for her for the last 12 years (she turned 12 in April, the Birthday party was awesome, we hired a hall at a leisure centre and had a huge roller disco). I basically didn't even have teenage years because of this. Pretty much all of my free time was spent helping look after my youngest sister because my other sister was too immature to help out (being a teenager herself) and my mother just up and left leaving my father and myself the only people who really took care of her. I've lost friends and had relationships because I always put helping look after her first. Actually even now my friends still assume I might not be able to make it to meet them because I still help to look after her.

        During college I basically moved back home during my second year and commuted from there to my lectures to I could help look after her and do the school run on my free days. Looking after kids is more then a full time job, it is something that changes everything and something that you do need to change things about yourself for. Things that you like to do get thrown to the bottom of the priorities pile.

        Actually I'm very lucky that my sister practically lives in the school library (which is also a public library outside of school hours), otherwise I would only be able to work until about 1430 to be able to get home in time to be there for her (but now I can work until 1500-1530).

        Basically, nobody is going to fault anyone that has to drop out of D&D due to having to look after children. They always come first and I think anyone hwere would yell at anyone else for ignoring their kids to play D&D anyway.

        But yeah, I wouldn't trade my circumstances for anything either.
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        • Re: Important Notices

          /respect


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          • Re: Important Notices

            Originally posted by Yygdrasil View Post
            She doesn't dictate anything about my life. We have work schedules that prevent us from seeing one another 5 days of the week. Saturday and Sunday are the only days I get to see her (awake). That I use a large chunk of such a limited time to play D&D with you all is more of a gesture to you. She holds the calendar of events that we have obligation to. I have soccer games for my sister that I never miss, football games for my brother that I never miss, birthdays and holidays that we push to the weekends so that we can attend them and a veritable plethora of chores and errands to run when we have a spare moment. Said calendar is in her possession and I pay little attention to it until she reminds me. Neither one of us has much of any time to ourselves and thanks to the aforementioned crazy and conflicting work schedules, we like to spend the time we mutually have off, together. Don't lecture me on healthy relationships.

            As for the bet that you like to bring up so often as an example of just how "whipped" I am, the whole arrangement was my idea. I made a bet, where my winning terms were nothing more than "ha, I told you" and hers was "no D&D for 2 weeks". I agreed to the terms, I lost, and I held to my word and carried out the sentence. How is that being controlled? We do that all the time and she loses just as often as I do.

            As for children, I was 18 when my brother was born, 19 when my sister was. I played 3rd parent to them during their entire life to date. I even left college during my junior year to alleviate my parents of the financial burden of my student loans so that they could afford to send the 2 of them to private schools where they could get the best educations available to them. I'm well aware of the responsibilities of a parent (outside of the financial obligations). I dare say I have far more experience in this than you do. I don't have to lecture you, I'm sure you're getting more than enough of that from your friends and family. However, in the off chance that your family doesn't care or you don't have friends: You'll find that children don't cater to your schedule, you cater to theirs. Just because it's your wife's "turn" to watch them doesn't mean she'll be rested enough to undertake the task. You have a lot of learning to do still. I wish you all the luck in the world as I do any parent. The things you like and enjoy don't matter nearly as much after kids (and shouldn't). What matters are the kids themselves. The sooner you learn that and prioritize them over yourself, the better. I would not only understand if you stopped D&D when yours is born, but I would encourage it. At least until the first year is over. Use your free time to rest and re-cooperate.

            Your presumption (joking or not) to know how my week's activities are designated is not only misinformed, but unwanted advice from someone whose idea of a fun day off involves drinking heavily.

            Don't claim to understand someone based on tidbits of information that you've garnished from casual interactions with them.

            - Wendy and I have spent 6 happy years virtually inseparable while balancing our limited time together with social obligations, errands, work and the occasional extracurricular activity such as D&D when there's sufficient time for it.

            - I've sacrificed more of my life for my brother and sister than you could possibly hope to sacrifice for your own child in the first 10 years of his/her life.

            I wouldn't trade neither circumstance for the world.

            - - - Updated - - -

            Have you not noticed that from Saturday to Monday, you never see me post on the forum? I don't waste any of my time off with this site unless I have to... or unless something is just plain too funny not to share.

            Feel better? Good. I just want to play D&D.

            So my time will be somewhat limited Saturday too. I was reminded that we have a company Christmas Party to goto Saturday, so I'll be needing to stop at 5:30pm PST / 8:30 EST / ??? SDT. So, I'm not sure how that affects playtime...

            - - - Updated - - -

            AND, I apologize if my post implied you care less for any of your brothers and sisters or your girlfriend. That's not what I had intended, but, that kind of looks like how you took it.
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            • Re: Important Notices

              If that many people have conflicting schedules, we might be better off postponing again. Looks like Armando, TM and you all have issues with times... and unless you can all find a comfortable balance, I'd say we hold off until you do.


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              • Re: Important Notices

                Ok was kinda looking forward to it but hey if everyone has RL stuff then we should hold off, just a bugger for me as I have no Life so nothing going on other than choosing a cat during the afternoon.

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                • Re: Important Notices

                  I was looking forward to it as well Jarre... But we'll get back on schedule hopefully soon
                  75: Sam, Nin, Blm, Thf, Pld, Cor, Rdm
                  RANK 10 Bastok
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                  Originally posted by Etra
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                  • Re: Important Notices

                    Originally posted by Jarre View Post
                    choosing a cat
                    wut?


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                    • Re: Important Notices

                      Yes I am getting a cat from a rescue centre part of my treatment as suggested by my psycologist.

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                      • Re: Important Notices

                        Got any names picked out? I'm partial towards "Lucky" or "Boo."

                        - - - Updated - - -

                        And can you get a dog instead? Because, well, dogs are better,
                        75: Sam, Nin, Blm, Thf, Pld, Cor, Rdm
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                        Wotg: Complete the quests already and I'll start

                        Originally posted by Etra
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                        • Re: Important Notices

                          I second the vote for Boo.

                          Alternatively, what about "Gary Sinese"? I always wanted to name a pet after him... for the lulz.


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                          • Re: Important Notices

                            I've always wanted a pet named Bob. I just that would be cool.

                            "Come here Bob! Bob! Sit! Good boy!"

                            - - - Updated - - -

                            To my initial point, try making a cat sit. And don't say cats can sit when commanded, those that can are the exception not the norm.
                            75: Sam, Nin, Blm, Thf, Pld, Cor, Rdm
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                            Originally posted by Etra
                            This thread brought to you by Malacite's lack of understanding.

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                            • Re: Important Notices

                              I'm gonna go out on a limb and say neither is really better, it depends on the individual animal. I've known dogs who were nasty and cats who were so laid back you could use them as a pillow.
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                              • Re: Important Notices

                                Originally posted by cidbahamut View Post
                                and cats who were so laid back you could use them as a pillow.
                                If that floats your boat. I'd rather use a pillow as a pillow and use an animal as a fun companion. Cat's can be fun, I just have had more luck with dogs being better companions. Cats are companions when it fancies them, dogs always love you no matter what.
                                75: Sam, Nin, Blm, Thf, Pld, Cor, Rdm
                                RANK 10 Bastok
                                CoP: Done
                                ZM: Done
                                ToA: Done
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                                Wotg: Complete the quests already and I'll start

                                Originally posted by Etra
                                This thread brought to you by Malacite's lack of understanding.

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