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  • How to pretend some of these games never happened.

    There are lots of games that don't live up to expectations, even realistic expectations. We went out and got these games, now we regret having ever touched them to start with. Post your game and rationalize it away!

    I'll go first.

    Devil May Cry 2

    DMC 2 sucked ass and we all know it. It was braindead compared to the original and Dante lost his cool attitude.

    Here's how to forget it.

    Play Shin Megami Tensei Nocturne. It has demons, an apocalyptic world, the devil and Dante is there, talking shit like he's supposed to. Granted, you can't play as him and its an RPG, but you can recruit Dante later in the game and the game is difficult. That's gotta count for something. And you get to be a demon the whole time, no Devil Trigger mode needed.

    Or you could play Viewtiful Joe 2. You'll get to unlock Dante and Trish and still induce massive carpel tunnel as you play. Its practically the same thing as DMC in that respect, just toony.

    Bottom Line: These games were better and they both had Dante in them and not some Cloud Strife wannabe with a Dante suit on.

    FFX-2

    OK, I liked this one, but lots of people don't. Here's how you can forget it.

    Play Xenosaga II or Wild Arms 3, they're actually much worse that you thought FFX-2 was, but you might slog through it for the story anyway. You'll replace your loathing for FFX-2 with a new loathing or maybe even come to appreciate FFX-2 instead.

    Or find a copy of Dragon Quest VIII. Don't let the fact that the characters look like they're straight out of Dragon Ball Z scare you, that's because the artist from DBZ draws them, the story is actually very coherent and the characters have more personality than Kosmos and Ziggy combined.

    Or you can just watch the digest movie of Xenosaga II packed in with Xenosaga III, that's 50+ hours of your life saved right there.

    Wii Music

    OK, not really a game, but its five minutes of your life wasted at any rate, or $40 wasted if you actually bought it.

    Try digging up a copy of any Guitar Hero, Rock Band, Beatmania or a Donkey Konga title. Much better time investment and much more fun. Those that grab Karaoke Revolution should die in a fire.

    Or just slam your head on a desk until you forgot you even touched the Wii Kiosk that day. That works too.
    Last edited by Omgwtfbbqkitten; 01-22-2009, 05:59 PM. Reason: cuz I had a typo, yo

  • #2
    Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

    I agree with you on the Xenosaga games, but I loved FFX-2.. Can't really say much there...

    Hmmm games on my list:

    FFVIII

    I may have loved FF1-7 and FF9-12, But damnit I hated FFVIII! SE must have been on crack when they created the story behind this game, I mean seriously... the whole orphans in the orphanage and the witch who was their orphan maid or what-the-hell ever. Here's how you can forget about it if you feel like me:

    Play FFIV again, either on the snes, gba, psone, or DS. Fantastic game that makes all your trouble disappear.

    I guess thats all I have for tonight haha
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    • #3
      Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

      Weird, in 8 as I remember it, Edea (Before becoming possessed by the sorceress) was married to Cid, and they had that orphanage, and the idea eventually grew into Garden.... It has been a few years since I played it tho. I actually liked FFVIII.
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      • #4
        Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

        I played FF8 a month or two ago. The plot made sense, but it was just lame, really.

        The best way to describe FFVIII, overall, is a bunch of great, original ideas, executed in a way that ranged from alright to flawed, with a very good presentation.

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        • #5
          Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

          Assassin's Creed

          So it was hyped to be a stealth game and spiritual successor to Prince of Persia yet all you got was a glitchy game with terrible controls, boring story and generic hack and slash gameplay. Steath goes out of the window after the tutorial as ever single target in the game instantly sees you in a cutscene and runs away leaving you stuck in an endless swordfight due to respawning guards and a broken counter system which interupted all of you attacks not called "counter".

          Play Prince of Persia. Well not Two Thrones, that one was terrible but any other will do. The last 3 Tomb Raider games work too. Dynasty Warriors (as long as it's not 4 *shudders*) and Heavenly Sword are good if you just want to hack hoardes of enemies apart while Tenchu works fine if you want to be a medieval assassin.
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          • #6
            Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

            Originally posted by Omgwtfbbqkitten View Post
            Devil May Cry 2
            This. 1000 times this. Lately I'm finding myself doing the same for DMC 4. I liked the game, but Nero is one of the worst Retcon jobs to spew from Capcom's ass in some time.

            I also agree 100% about Wii Music btw.


            Chrono Cross

            One of the most spectactular CG intros ever made, the game grabs your attention right away... and then kicks you in the balls.

            Best way to forget about this is to play Chrono Trigger I find, and then just go with whatever one of the 12 endings you like best ^^
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            • #7
              Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

              Originally posted by Malacite View Post
              Chrono Cross

              One of the most spectactular CG intros ever made, the game grabs your attention right away... and then kicks you in the balls.
              I don't think I could have put that any better if I tried... I think they could have done a much better job doing a sequel to CT. Now, if they felt like continuing the series, they'd have to put together something that combines them both, which is kinda difficult...
              Last edited by KingOfZeal; 01-22-2009, 06:57 PM.
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              • #8
                Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                This. 1000 times this. Lately I'm finding myself doing the same for DMC 4. I liked the game, but Nero is one of the worst Retcon jobs to spew from Capcom's ass in some time.
                Attitude and Action make Capcom games, never take the story seriously because its always going to be tremendous crap. Every time. No matter how awesome the Capcom game is.

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                • #9
                  Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                  Gotta say I really liked FFVIII, the combat and magic junction system is what threw me on a loop. And hey, Chrono Cross was pretty good too in my opinion, dont have any complaints on it really. The one game that really pissed me off was Xenosaga II, seriously, wtf was up with that game, only reason i trudged through it was to know wtf was going on in part 3! RAWR wth!

                  Another game that pisses me off was a little shitty game called Astonishia Story that i picked up for my psp two years ago, worst $10 i ever spent, good thing it was ONLY $10 /sigh
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                  • #10
                    Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                    Originally posted by Firewind View Post
                    Assassin's Creed

                    So it was hyped to be a stealth game and spiritual successor to Prince of Persia yet all you got was a glitchy game with terrible controls, boring story and generic hack and slash gameplay. Steath goes out of the window after the tutorial as ever single target in the game instantly sees you in a cutscene and runs away leaving you stuck in an endless swordfight due to respawning guards and a broken counter system which interupted all of you attacks not called "counter".
                    Hmmm...I beat that game about two weeks ago and I was able to do instant kills to 4/9 targets without them seeing me. As for the counter system i thought it was broken but for the player. I could easily drop 10 guards without taking damage. For a challenge I was only using the hidden blade for the last 3 targets.

                    As for the original topic I have to go with Def Jam Icon.

                    Games to play to forget...any game from SoulCalibur, Dead or Alive, Tekken, Virtua Fighter or previous Def Jam fighting game.
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                    • #11
                      Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                      Mega Man X6

                      The plot was horrible. The stages were badly designed to the point of being obnoxious. The translation job looked rushed as hell. The production values went down (no more anime cutscenes.) It was then followed by X7, which deviates from the formula greatly by being in 3D and introducing a completely unnecessary new main character that shouldn't be on equal footing with X or Zero in the first place.

                      The remedy? Skip everything after X5 and go straight to Mega Man Zero 1-4. With higher difficulties and unprecedented levels of Zero bad-assery, as well as a continuous plot that's actually decent, it's a much better alternative.

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                      • #12
                        Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                        This is more like a "How to let everyone bash games they don't like" thread.

                        The only really, truly bad game listed so far is Xenosaga II (edit: fuck i'm retarded X6 was really terrible). All the others are at least "meh" quality, and a few (FF8, Chrono Cross) are pretty widely regarded to be really good.


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                        • #13
                          Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                          Originally posted by Omgwtfbbqkitten View Post
                          Attitude and Action make Capcom games, never take the story seriously because its always going to be tremendous crap. Every time. No matter how awesome the Capcom game is.
                          Which is a complete utter shame because Capcom tends to come up with some very good stories and then just shits all over them...

                          I'm looking at YOU Resident Evil. For that matter, who the fuck decided survival horror had to die and be bastardized into action games with "zombies"?

                          Seriously I miss the days of Silent Hill and RE 1-3 where you actually had to make your bullets count and fight strategically. Now every asshole and their cousin will randomly drop ammo for you and everything is so damned fast-paced (At least Dead Space had a new twist on combat and some seriously creepy atmosphere)


                          I'd also like to know who's brilliant fucking idea it was to make Dante a side character and use Nero to attract new fans to DMC. I mean we all know that making a retcon carbon copy of the series' icon is the best way to go about things - _ -


                          EDIT: Speaking of X6, I rather liked Zero's ending since it fit well into the MMZ series, but then they went and said "fuck that" with X-7 and X-8 (Someone please murder Axel, please?) At least X-8 was kind of fun.


                          I'm tired of seeing my favorite series dieing off one by one from progressively worse sequels and spin-offs. First Donkey Kong, then Sonic and now it looks like Rockman isn't too far off. At least Snake got to bow out with grace and dignity. And I found Xenosaga II was a great game, story-wise. Maybe a little too complex for some people but I was able to follow it just fine. What I didn't care for was the battle system. Good LORD did they ever screw it up, and 3 wasn't much better.
                          Last edited by Malacite; 01-22-2009, 11:17 PM.
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                          • #14
                            Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                            Oh geeze, don't get me started on Xenosaga II... That had to of been the worst battle system I've ever played. I'm sorry, but when you go back to places you were at 20 levels ago, the fights should still not be 10 minutes... I only finished that game to say I beat it after I got Xenosaga III, which did everything right, which of course was too late. I hated the Taru hands they all had too. I think the thing that made it bearable was chaos saying "Sorry" every time he beat something up as if he was apologizing for being in such a horrible game.

                            I liked Chrono Cross. Just so many characters, it's crazy. The music is just fantastic too, I had to get the OST for it.

                            I really just had to respond to Xenosaga II...ugh... Didn't have any real input other than that...
                            To be the best in this game...you must help each other become the best.




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                            • #15
                              Re: How to pretend some of these games never happened.

                              Capcom Fighting Evolution

                              [ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2p1UTVpA__U]YouTube - Fun With CFE[/ame]

                              Just watch some of the dumbshit you can do lol...the dinosaur is so fucked. Ryu cannot fight a giant squid that has bs fireballs(look up some matches if you want) and its just..a copy paste clusterfuck.

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