Fibs your parents told you.

[ShadowHolyFlyingDragon]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

My Dad told me in the 4th grade that if I managed to get straight A's on a report card, he would give me 50$. This was back in 1984, so that much money to a 10 year old is like winning the lottery.

I didn't manage to make straight A's until I hit 6th grade and so when I showed my Dad my report card, he was really happy and proud of me. I asked him for my 50$ bux and he said I had to wait til he got paid....... God Rest his soul, he passed away about 3 years ago, in 2007.

....... I've never got my 50$.

lol I just gave away my age....

[Durahansolo]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

My dad told me when I was a kid that my grandmother (His mom known as Grandma T) could outrun any of the other kids in his neighborhood. (He never said how old these kids were )

I asked my other grandmother (My mom's mom known as Grandma S) when I was a kid, what the creases were in the palm of my hand. Her response ewas "Oh that is your love line! Let me read your palm... Oh yeah see right here, here are all the girls you like (she names them off lol.)" Around that same time I noticed I had some notch marks on the back of my index finger nail. I asked my grandmother what they were, and she replied that I had one for every girl that I liked (then she named them off lol).

Ah I have a good one: When Grandma S bought that house, there was a huge refrigerator with a built in lock on it in the basement. My brother and my cousins used to speculate that there was pirate gold, a dead body, guns, and mafia money hidden in that fridge. When my grandmother passed away a few years ago, my brother broke it open and there was absolutely nothing in there.

The True Story:
The people who owned the house originally left the refrigerator there because they couldn't get it out of the basement and told her that they'd come back to get it. Because of that she never let us play near it or try to open it. For whatever reason though, the people never came back to get it and so it stayed in the basement for years. Matter of a fact, when we sold the house a couple of years ago we left it down there, so it should be still down there unless the new family got it out of there.

[Romyro]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

I got a friend whose dad tried to convince us that he could run faster than his shadow.

[Pwnagraphic]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

This thread is hilarious..

[Durahansolo]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

This thread is hilarious..

Somebody should start a thread for Family Quotes too.

[TheGrandMom]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

The lie that stands out for me was when I was 10 and had to stay with my family in Iowa for a couple of weeks. They were farmers and lived in a big rambling farm house. The dad was one of those guys that rarely speaks but the looks he can give say everything. So my mom tells me on the way to the house that these family members are the outcasts. That there are rumors of strange things going on in the house so I should keep my eyes open and tell her anything weird I see when she comes back in a few weeks. I was a tad freaked out when I was dropped off but the family seemed rather nice and normal so I quickly settled down.

There were 2 kids my age that I hung around with. They took me around the farm and got me familiar with the place. Then my aunt told me what my chores were, what the rules were, and..........don't ever...EVER...go in the attic! Inside my mind I thought, AH HA! mom said they were suspicious...I wonder whats in the attic. So of course I'm going to try and talk about this with the kids but they'd just look at each other scared and wouldn't say anything but "don't go in the attic".

One day I had to go inside and change my clothes (after being trampled by pigs) while everyone was outside doing chores. The attic door was right next to the bedroom I was staying in so I figured I'd tip toe up there really quick and see for myself. Well as I got to the top of the attic stairs, I heard my aunt in the kitchen yelling for me. What I saw up there chilled my blood....bodies....bodies wrapped in thick plastic....

Ok I'm a kid and now I'm scared to DEATH! I try to get ahold of my mom but shes on a cruise and I can't. I call my grandma and beg her to go stay by her house but she says no that I'd be bored. I've got about a week left OF HELL in this place and I'm afraid they are going to kill me.

Well they really laid it on thick once I confided to the daughter that I'd been in the attic. The entire family was in on it and would do anything to scare the shit out of me. The dad would just sit at the dinner table and stare at me with this evil evil look. I've never been more scared in my entire life. I can laugh at it now but omfg....it was f**king CRUEL! So the last day when my mom was coming to get me, they were doing a lot of whispering and once I "overheard" them say something about having enough plastic and they had to hurry because my mom was going to be here soon. So I went and hid in the feed bin....I practically buried myself in the shit and cried until I heard my mothers voice. I remember sobbing so hard and trying to tell her they were going to kill me and there were a bunch of bodies in the attic. She had to practically drag me up there to see that they were mannequins and not bodies. My aunt had owned a womans clothing store that closed.

My mom told me she lied to me to give me a mystery to solve and that she had them all in on it too. I loved Nancy Drew/Hardy Boys books so she thought I'd have more fun if I thought I had a mystery to solve.........she couldn't have been more WRONG!

[Pwnagraphic]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

Somebody should start a thread for Family Quotes too.

Ha.. My mom "You are so stupit!" or "Shawn, I seriously think you're retarted sometimes!"

TGM.. That story brought me to tears lmao.

[Neverslip]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

When driving near but above a large body of water you know how the surface has differences? Like large splotches where the waves are just smaller or somewhat different? Yeah... those dark spots, those are giant freshwater sharks ready to eat anyone swimming out to far especially children. OH and those bright color'd balls that are attached to the powerlines around large bodies of water, those are UFO's.

There were so many wierd ass mind F's they pulled like that those are the only ones that stand out. I remember something about a ghost in a barn at a family friend's house too. Ghost of a lil blonde boy who killed other lil blonde boys out of jealousy. I still went in that old barn and did stupid boy-crap.

[Ketaru]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

That the Sega Genesis would explode if I don't take the game out of it when I stopped playing.

[ShadowHolyFlyingDragon]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

Oh, here's another one...

My Mom told me that I was going to go to hell for putting lit M-80's inside of frogs mouths and watching them blow up. I know that's a lie because there's no such thing as the devil, honestly!. She's such a kidder....... =glances nervously anyway=

[Icemage]

Re: Fibs your parents told you.

I remember when my parents told me to be extra careful not to accidentally swallow seeds when eating fruit because it would cause a tree to grow in your stomach.

Oh, and I'm not even religious but you're definitely going to hell, ShadowHolyFlyingDragon.


Icemage