Brooklyn man kills girlfriend, then self, after New Year's Eve argument

[Ketaru]

Brooklyn man kills girlfriend, then self, after New Year's Eve argument

Normally, news like this isn't post-worthy. Crimes like this occur all the time. But you never really think you'd read this sort of article when it's about somebody you know.

The woman in this article, who we all called Ah-Ling, was my Uncle's ex-wives. After about 3 years of unresolved issues, the two of them had a divorce about a year and a half ago. Despite that, my Uncle was unable to let go of her and always let her keep coming back to stay at the house, despite the fact she wouldn't take any responsible for the children in it anymore.

Of note though, the article is wrong (whether it changes facts for sensationalism or otherwise). Yes, Ah-Ling was from Malaysia. We suspect she married my Uncle because she wanted to stay in the country. And she divorced when it was clear he couldn't control his gambling addiction. However, she did not have a spouse and 4 children still in Malaysia. Her 4 children live in Brooklyn, as does her ex-husband.

I wasn't really close to her, but it is sad for her family. And a bit of a shock to see a news article like this about a family member.

[Omgwtfbbqkitten]

Re: Brooklyn man kills girlfriend, then self, after New Year's Eve argument

Without going too long-winded, I just want to say I know where you're coming from here and I've experienced a blend of those events in my life, though ground zero was very close to me. It wasn't a murder-suicide, but there was a family member murdered in my life and I've lost someone close to suicide not long after. And yes, there was a shade of journalistic sensationalism to go with them, which pissed me off a bit.

You sound a little distant from this and perhaps that's a blessing to itself. When you lose those close to you by these two unfortunate ends, you tend to experience some really irreconcilable rage meshed with some real distress and sorrow. Rage for the one who brought this all about, sorrow for who was lost and more rage because you because the source of blame can't be brought back and judged.

Its a scar, it won't go away. It fades little over time, but it will always be there and so will the anger when those memories resonate against it.