What is your a**hole doing??

[TheGrandMom]

I was talking with a friend today and he told me this and it totally cracked me up so I thought I'd share:

A professor at the University of Mississippi was giving a lecture on “Involuntary Muscular Contractions” to his first year medical students. He realized that this was not the most riveting subject, so the professor decided to lighten the mood slightly.

He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, “Do you know what your ass hole is doing while you’re having an orgasm?”

She replied, “Probably deer hunting with his buddies.”

The professor laughed so hard he could not continue with the class.

[illkurok]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

That begs the question... Just what Is her anus doing during orgasm...
I mean I guess she could have a rifle there... but...

[Kitalrez]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

Just what Is her anus doing during orgasm...

The other guy? I dunno, doesn't sound like she's too concerned with monogamy if she having orgasms while her asshole is out hunting. Either that, or she's got a great toy collection... which also pretty much answers your question.

[ruffrydasean]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

It just puckered reading the title of thread D:

[illkurok]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

It just puckered reading the title of thread D:

What do you relate this place too O.o

[Balfree]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

lol the absent guy got PWNED.

[Jarre]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

LOL that woman was quick off the mark.

Talking of arseholes and farts you know that when you fart your arse is merely applouding according to teh Big Yin, he does a funny routine on it here.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=txgB2ZxEpI0&feature=related]YouTube - billy connolly[/ame]

[Balfree]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

lol i love that guy, he can just stand there and do nothing and ill shit my pants (just to keep on topic) laughing.

[TheGrandMom]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

I'm calling them "flatches" and "flatchettes" from now on! Btw, 'd him in The Last Samurai and I cried when he died.

[Callisto]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

Wait so the question in the thread title is rhetorical then?

[Jarre]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

I've seen him live twice, every show is unique as he always adds in about what he saw the day before or that week or about soemthing on the news. Both times he did 2.5 hours straight no break and the 2nd show was 90% different to the first one I saw 3 years previous. You stumble out of teh venue with your sids huryting and loosing your voice from laughing so much. 2nd show i got to meet him but allowed my friend to be photographed with him (as thats the person I am) as his management would only let one of us. Still got my ticket signed and can say I have shaken the hand of the Big Yin.

ahem..
back to the OP

Some Fartastic facts on farts... (its amazing what crap you find on the WWW)

What is fart gas made of?
The composition of fart gas is highly variable. Most of the air we swallow, especially the oxygen component, is absorbed by the body before the gas gets into the intestines. By the time the air reaches the large intestine, most of what is left is nitrogen. Chemical reactions between stomach acid and intestinal fluids may produce carbon dioxide, which is also a component of air and a product of bacterial action. Bacteria also produce hydrogen and methane. But the relative proportions of these gases that emerge from our anal opening depend on several factors: what we ate, how much air we swallowed, what kinds of bacteria we have in our intestines, and how long we hold in the fart.

What makes farts stink?
The odor of farts comes from small amounts of hydrogen sulfide gas and mercaptans in the mixture. These compounds contain sulfur. Nitrogen-rich compounds such as skatole and indole also add to the stench of farts. The more sulfur-rich your diet, the more sulfides and mercaptans will be produced by the bacteria in your guts, and the more your farts will stink. Foods such as cauliflower, eggs and meat are notorious for producing smelly farts, whereas beans produce large amounts of not particularly stinky farts.

Why do farts make noise?
The sounds are produced by vibrations of the anal opening. Sounds depend on the velocity of expulsion of the gas and the tightness of the sphincter muscles of the anus. Contrary to a popular misconception, fart noise is not generated by the flapping of the butt cheeks.

On average, a person produces about half a liter of fart gas per day, distributed over an average of about fourteen daily farts.


(and my favourite question/quote)

Do men fart more than women?
No, women fart just as much as men. It's just that most men take more pride in it than most women. There is a large variation among individuals in the amount of fart gas produced per day, but the variation does not correlate with gender.

[Caspian]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

Itching



As for Bily Connolly: Absolutely awesome in Boondock Saints

[Balfree]

Re: What is your a**hole doing??

14 per day?

There's probably something wrong with me then.