I'm so pissed!

[Ameroth]

Re: I'm so pissed!

You guys are surprised that Dak (or Jarre) wouldn't hesitate to condescend to others and make all sorts of assumptions about the situation?

To the OP: Life is tough sometimes. You're family is just getting over one of those bumps along the way. I'm sure you'll be fine in the end.

[dirtyclown]

Re: I'm so pissed!

One of the places that I said I couldn't work there because I didn't finished high school was a super market, and the other one was fast food. They said, "you cant work here unless you are currently in school, you have your GED, or you have completed highschool."

Little known fact: You can easily lie about having graduated highschool, employers don't have any rights to see your school transcripts. Just tell them you graduated in like 2005 or something and try not to make it obvious. I got a job by doing that after I dropped out.

[Neomage]

Re: I'm so pissed!

My family went from 100k to 20k... THAT sucks.

[DakAttack]

Re: I'm so pissed!

You're ridiculous.

We know virtually nothing beyond what the OP has said about the situation. But that doesn't stop you. You're willing to write an entire saga of bad parenting, extravagant purchases, and a general laissez faire attitude about money in general. Never mind the actual facts, or other extenuating factors. You seem completely fixated on the fact that they were making over 100k, never mind that depending on where they live, that may not be very much at all. His mother is a nurse, and his father makes 40k a year, which means he's hardly some sort of high-powered executive. 40k is less than then many people make right out of college.

It's not like the OP is lamenting that they are going to have to let some of the staff go, or that they'll have to sell their summer home in Southampton. He's saying "Hey, this bad thing happened to our family, and it sucks."

He's given us the facts, or his best estimate of them, and I've read enough of his posts to judge his character. You and Feba being so supportive of him is nice to see, though out of character.

I'm not sure why you don't understand what it is to buy into an expensive lifestyle. They live in the boondocks, and judging from what he's said thus far I can't assume that they're family has lived their for a while, but I can assume they knew it was expensive. That's called buying into an expensive lifestyle. Out here in Maryland there are people who work in DC, but can't afford to live anywhere near it. Some people commute for three hours or more from towns near Pennsylvania because they can't afford anything closer. They've bought into a less expensive lifestyle. They didn't just appear in the boondocks, so at some point they must have made the decision to move out there.

Up here we live in the boondocks because it's cheap, so I'm not sure why it would be so expensive for you guys down in Florida. I should add that nothing really remains boondock for long, here.

For the OP, so I'm not too useless in this thread: You should be able to cut down on your phone bill with Vonage. Twenty bucks a month, and it piggy-backs on your internet connection. They send you a box, you plug it into your router, shazzam. Most car insurance providers will lower your bills for good behavior, and if your family is providing cars for the kids than they need to take advantage of that opportunity and find a job

[Brielle]

Re: I'm so pissed!

I can understand offering some support and perhaps a bit of constructive criticism, but I would not make assumptions that someone is philandering their money in an irresponsibly manner unless you know the situation on a personal level.

This really does not need to turn into an argument, I doubt Bluecat posted this to receive some of the input that it has been warranting. Obviously this is a very personal issue for his family, whether or not he intended to share that much information does not mean that we can assume to understand everything about it.

As much as I would love to, I am not going to try and censor what people say. I will recommend that you do take into account the intimacy this holds for someone and the use of tact when you encounter something like this. People do have feelings, even if this is "just the internet".

[Murphie]

Re: I'm so pissed!

It's not out of character at all.

[Brielle]

Re: I'm so pissed!

It's not out of character at all.

I am missing something here. What exactly do you mean by this?

[Ameroth]

Re: I'm so pissed!

I am not going to try and censor what people say.

Censoring can burn in hell.

I am missing something here. What exactly do you mean by this?

It's "not out of [Murphie's] character at all" is what he means.

I've read enough of his posts to judge his character.

Lol.

I'm not sure why you don't understand what it is to buy into an expensive lifestyle.

I can understand this idea of enjoying luxury and consequently paying into it; but have u considered that living expenses are different in Florida than they are in Maryland?

[Bluecat]

Re: I'm so pissed!

Ok 1) My parents have to have sell phones for work, I have a cell phone to keep in touch with them if I am gone off someware. Also we cant just quit them, I still have 3 years on my contract if I broke it I would have to pay like 400$ 2) My mom needs DSL for her laptop, and I need it for mine as well..and we need it for the router to work. 3) We dont have all the equipment, that is used for Vonage, so we would have to buy all that. 4) you want me to do all these things that seem to cost much more money. 5) When we bought this house it was only 25,000$ now its like 125,000$ that was almost 10 years ago though. Like Feba and Murphie have said so many times, most of the things we do is not for luxiery its because we have to have it. I dont think my parents are going to cut anything, I also blame my brother for not working and us having to pay 2k a month just for his damn car and his apt bills.

[Jarre]

Re: I'm so pissed!

I also blame my brother for not working and us having to pay 2k a month just for his damn car and his apt bills.

This is a mistake they made which they need to get your brother to get off his lazy ass and contribute to it himself.

Also what people are totally missing the point of my long winded post was that you can cut down bills using teh suggestions I posted. Those suggestions about cooking more food properly, relying less on convenience food i.e. packed food for more veg and meat, yes it takes time to prepare but if everyone chips in it doesn't.. And about saving on heating and electicity bills... There was a survey done in the Uk and 45% of electricity and gas used by peoples homes could be cut if they followed the advice I posted. also energy saving lightbulbs are very cheap now you can get a bulb that takes 12w power and produces teh same light as a 100W bulb. Now that light bulb here in the uk only costs $0.30 to be switched on for 83 hours rather than $1.26 for a 100w standard bulb for the same amount of time, imagine that for every bulb in your house. I cut down my electicity bill by 15% by just replacing bulbs with energy efficent ones and switching them on only when required and always switching them off when i leave the room.

Please read my post I made before carefully, you will find that I am providing money saving advice that you CAN do to save on your families bills without to much difficulty.

By bleeding off your parents it means they buy you all your food, put a roof over your head etc, do you contribute any money towards that? if not, then you are bleeding off your parents. its fine to bitch and moan about something, but don't stop there, do something about it, help out, get a part time job and help your family, rather than complain and bitch about your family ain't got enough money.

My parents were low income earners I had to work bloody hard to put myself through college and university they couldn't pay a penny, I am still paying off my student loan now 6 years on from University, the cost of living here in teh Uk is rediculous and i have managed to live with payign all bills by watching what I spend.

you and you family can do it.

what you need to do is work out what you spend each week, produce a spreadsheet.

split it into main bills, food and extras.

Then look how you can save on each area. can you combine power bills i.e. gas/electric with a single company? we can here int eh Uk and you get a discount on it. can you get online bills rather than paper bills for phone, bank and power that saves money. Can you pay be direct debit? that saves on bills. Is your families credit card rate to high? can you go elsewhere for lower interest?

I have been through this exercise and it helped me alot, its a situation that affect millions of people and your family are no different, you just have to sit down see what you spend now, see what you can save, its amazing what you find you are wasting money on without realising.

I am giving you constructive advice, don't be quick to shoot it down, becuase it is advice that anyone can take on board, no matter what your situation.

[Bluecat]

Re: I'm so pissed!

This is a mistake they made which they need to get your brother to get off his lazy ass and contribute to it himself.

Also what people are totally missing the point of my long winded post was that you can cut down bills using teh suggestions I posted. Those suggestions about cooking more food properly, relying less on convenience food i.e. packed food for more veg and meat, yes it takes time to prepare but if everyone chips in it doesn't.. And about saving on heating and electicity bills... There was a survey done in the Uk and 45% of electricity and gas used by peoples homes could be cut if they followed the advice I posted. also energy saving lightbulbs are very cheap now you can get a bulb that takes 12w power and produces teh same light as a 100W bulb. Now that light bulb here in the uk only costs $0.30 to be switched on for 83 hours rather than $1.26 for a 100w standard bulb for the same amount of time, imagine that for every bulb in your house. I cut down my electicity bill by 15% by just replacing bulbs with energy efficent ones and switching them on only when required and always switching them off when i leave the room.

Please read my post I made before carefully, you will find that I am providing money saving advice that you CAN do to save on your families bills without to much difficulty.

By bleeding off your parents it means they buy you all your food, put a roof over your head etc, do you contribute any money towards that? if not, then you are bleeding off your parents. its fine to bitch and moan about something, but don't stop there, do something about it, help out, get a part time job and help your family, rather than complain and bitch about your family ain't got enough money.

My parents were low income earners I had to work bloody hard to put myself through college and university they couldn't pay a penny, I am still paying off my student loan now 6 years on from University, the cost of living here in teh Uk is rediculous and i have managed to live with payign all bills by watching what I spend.

you and you family can do it.

what you need to do is work out what you spend each week, produce a spreadsheet.

split it into main bills, food and extras.

Then look how you can save on each area. can you combine power bills i.e. gas/electric with a single company? we can here int eh Uk and you get a discount on it. can you get online bills rather than paper bills for phone, bank and power that saves money. Can you pay be direct debit? that saves on bills. Is your families credit card rate to high? can you go elsewhere for lower interest?

I have been through this exercise and it helped me alot, its a situation that affect millions of people and your family are no different, you just have to sit down see what you spend now, see what you can save, its amazing what you find you are wasting money on without realising.

I am giving you constructive advice, don't be quick to shoot it down, becuase it is advice that anyone can take on board, no matter what your situation.

Most of the advice you are giving though doesn't work in the USA, we have bought the light bulbs that you are talking about once because they cost so much more then the regular ones do. Also, you cant use gas/elect from one single company in the USA either. Thats what I am trying to tell you the USA is way different then the UK is. The advice you are giving makes it MORE expensive then inexpensive. Also, I have said that we don't eat out that much , my mom cooks all the time, and its not like we spend a fourtine on that either. I am not turning down what you are saying, I do agree that there are some things that my family does need to cut down on, but not everything.

Also, how would I get to the job? I cant drive, cant afford a car right about now. (To scared to drive anyway.) Even if I could get a job, I coudn't exactly get there ya know? Also, when you call someone a bitch, and that I am feeding off of my parents, that doesn't really help or make you a nice person at all. You can give me advice on things, but don't sit here calling me names, saying that I am doing nothing. You don't know how my life has been, what shit I have been threw. I am trying to do everything I can. I made this post, because I didn't know what to say to my mom. I just wanted stuff to tell her not stuff that we shouldn't do anymore. I wanted advice on her getting a job etc..and you keep missing that point. I did not make this thread, to be told to cut down on things.

My dad does do online banking but that really has nothing to do with it, we also don't have a credit card we have a debit card. (doesn't give you points, takes money straight from your account.)

One more thing, we have done all this stuff, and we still do, I am not saying that we are not going to survive, I am just saying that its going to be different and harder for us till she starts working again. Even if I didn't live at home I would still of posted this topic. If I worked I would help out my parents in a heart beat. I have tried everything I can do get a job, I am sorry I didn't graduate high school or anything. But I have really done all I could do.

[Jarre]

Re: I'm so pissed!

Blue, I gather you don't use the expression "to bitch about" in the US meaning to moan/rant etc. I'm not calling you a bitch ok.

2ndly you havn't given much information, wheres the nearest town?, public transport etc. (although I do know that in the US public transport is few and far between making you very reliant on cars which is somethign your whole country needs to kick into gear to sort out before an oil crisis makes you realise the problems we are facing here in the UK)

From what you are sayign the age old "land of the free" is a load of bollocks, and it sounds like companies and corportations are milking you all dry, I'm glad I don't live their if thats the case, at least here we have choice and managed competition and independant agencies that make sure utility companies don't take the piss with pricing and give us some form of rights.

I am only giving you a kick in the right direction to look into things and think about things. Its a pity the USA as a country in general are so greedy with regard to energy, here in the Uk they are really forcing energy saving down our throats and you can buy an energy saving bulb now for $2 and lasts 10 years as well as over incentives! this all stems from the EU and their regulatory ways.

The true fact is if you can cut out something you don't need, reduce doing something by changing your ways slightly, it wil make this difficult period a bit easier to sit through. You just need to screw your head on right and look it straight in the face and get on with it.

My tone of posts is just a throught provoking exercise, their is only one way things will work and that is if you all concentrate and work something out, we can all sit here on this forum and give you snippets of advice ideas, but at the end of the day you need to take these on board and do something. every piece of advice posted in this thread is usefull and thought provoking, analyze them, look at each one and accept or reject which ever fits your situation. we are a global community and ideas from different countries can give you an insight into doing things differently.

And blue I do know what you are going through, I was nearly made homeless when I was younger as we struggled through life, i've been in a situation where I couldn't get new clothes for many years, could only afford to eat 2 meals a day and were without heating for a year at one stage with no TV, or electricity. Those were tough days and I wouldn't wish them on anyone, but I survived it and made something of my life. Don't give up to easily, this is just a blip on the road of life, things WILL get better if you put effort into doing something about it.

[Kittyneko]

Re: I'm so pissed!

I've had to work for my own food several times since I was 12.. My mother didn't care much. (Circumstances)

To be honest, it's really easy to get a job Bluecat. A simple job.. just make sure you properly apply to at least say, 3-4 jobs a day. You'll find a simple job in a local shop somewhere, no doubt. And if you don't like it you just quit, simple as that. With just a bit pocketmoney which enables you to buy some groceries every now and then, really helps your parents out a lot, I promise.

Also you can ask friends etc. to see if they know a place to work, a supermarket or so.

[Nuriko]

Re: I'm so pissed!

DSL Bill: 300$ a month

That's quite a bit ... no options? I know that here in Canada, it's perfectly possible to go with any of a number of companies, and prices for DSL are a fraction of that.

[eticket109]

Re: I'm so pissed!

The internet, where everyone is more of an expert on your life than you are.