Questions on bibles.

[Feba]

I got a pamphlet from some religious organization in the mail today. I tossed it out, but one thing I couldn't help but notice was a quote that "The greatest pleasure in human life is reading god's word, and tasting him through it".

I'm curious as to exactly how I'm supposed to taste god. Do I lick the pages, or tear them off and chew on them? Is the ink non-toxic? (Believers in christ are supposed to be able to ingest poisons without dying, of course)

[Mog]

Re: Questions on bibles.

I got a pamphlet from some religious organization in the mail today. I tossed it out, but one thing I couldn't help but notice was a quote that "The greatest pleasure in human life is reading god's word, and tasting him through it".

I'm curious as to exactly how I'm supposed to taste god. Do I lick the pages, or tear them off and chew on them? Is the ink non-toxic? (Believers in christ are supposed to be able to ingest poisons without dying, of course)

Try eating the Bible.

Disclaimer: If you grow wings and start creating miracles, I cannot be held accountable.

[Feba]

Re: Questions on bibles.

Well, they're kinda thick. I think that might be biting off a bit more than I can chew.

[sykoticjestr]

Re: Questions on bibles.

dice it up and make a holy stew outta it

[Wise Donkey]

Re: Questions on bibles.

You could boil the Hell out of it first, might make it easier.

[Feba]

Re: Questions on bibles.

Would I need holy water for that?

[Wise Donkey]

Re: Questions on bibles.

Can't hurt, though I really don't feel it is necessary.

[sykoticjestr]

Re: Questions on bibles.

once you put the bible in the water it becomes holy water. careful though. sideeffects may include but are not limited too: headaches, earaches, stomache aches, back aches, running nose, itchy eyes, watery eyes, scratchy throat, upper respritory infection, elevated cholesteral and bloodpressure levels, heart attck, stroke, loss of vision, loss of hearing, loss of sanity, and in some cases spontaneous combustion. other than those side effects its a great product. enjoy

[Jarre]

Re: Questions on bibles.

Don't forget the waste product is valuable and don't scream the obvious "Holy shit" after the event.

[DakAttack]

Re: Questions on bibles.

If you want to have sex with Jesus I can scrounge around for a link to the religious organization's website that can help, but tasting God? You're on your own.

[nanatsu]

Re: Questions on bibles.

Tear it up into little pieces, pour milk into it, and call it Christ Chex. It's a miracle in every bowl.

[Ellipses]

Re: Questions on bibles.

God wants you to develop synesthesia.

I suggest acid.

[cadoxangelus]

Re: Questions on bibles.

i seriously need to stop reading these forums when im at work.

mmm christ chex... not a bad idea. i second the notion

[JTF-Taru]

Re: Questions on bibles.

[ame=http://www.amazon.com/Incredible-Edible-Bible-Fun-Memorable/dp/0764420011]Amazon.com: Incredible Edible Bible Fun: Making God's Word Memorable With Easy Recipes Children Can Do: Nanette Goings: Books[/ame]

JTF