I just don't get this guy.

[Omgwtfbbqkitten]

The pros and cons of getting PLed are very well established issues and people seldom change the minds on that matter. I think its weak to ask, but I endure those who insist on having one since it seems unavoidable at low level. I just let people enjoy the illusion that they're progressing more quickly.

So I have this friend who PLs this guy a lot. He now wants to take MNK to 75 and she PLs him through the 40s on her 75 WHM, even helps him get his MNK coffers in advance.

Just so happens she had SMN near his level and wants to level it. This seemed to be a good opportunity to repay her, but he clearly did not take it because her SMN is 50 and his MNK has zipped to 60+ a couple weeks later.

I think that if you're going to be so reliant on somone for your progress that you should reward them handsomely. She's helped me a lot and is one of my best friends in the game, but I never turn to her for PL (or anyone, for that matter). If she asks for help with something, I drop what I'm doing to go help. I'll spam the fame or make the time to get mission/quest progress to be able to help her out.

I just don't get this guy. I kinda want to cuss him out.

[Murphie]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

It's not really any of your business, to be honest. So curse him out if you like, but since it's between the two of them, don't be surprised if you are told to butt out.

[Wise Donkey]

Re: I just don't get this guy.


All joking aside, Karma's a bitch - don't worry yourself over this guy, he will get his, and your friend will reap her rewards from her good reputation as a helper-outer.

[Clever Ninja]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

It sounds like someone I know in my current LS. When I came back around 2 weeks ago I started on my Hume and met these cool people from my LS in a Dunes party when leveling WHM, and this one girl was on her WHM PL us. After that she'll occasionally get 'bored' according to her and just come to whoever is leveling a job in the Dunes and will PL for awhile.

Anyway, to get to the point, ym Galka RNG was 12 at the time and she mentioned that she was going to level her 13 PLD, and asked if I was interested in leveling. Despite being on my RDM Hume in a Qufim party with a PL, which would have got me out of Qufim's level range that very same day I bet, I dropped it and logged on to my Galka to level with her, mostly because she's been real helpful.

Main point I'm trying to make is people like the MNK your mentioning are just assholes who take advantage of the kindness very few FFXI players have nowadays. In the end he's gonna need her help and she'll hopefully have the guts to turn him down.

P.S. IMAGE FTW

[Telera]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

Well, like others have said, you'll probably have to rely on faith in Karma. Eventually this nice person will get sick of getting nothing for her efforts and go about her merry way. I don't know about cursing him out, but maybe a quick talk on the side about generosity and thankfulness...

Everyone who's helped me on FFXI, I've made an honest attempt to either thank them regularly if I cannot physically help them out, or help them when I can. I remember the names of people who helped me who likely don't even remember me. I would wave at them when I see them, but it would likely freak them out, so I don't.

[Saren]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

This sort of thing gets tricky fast. Talk to your whm friend about it and make sure she understands he was using her either because he's retarded and doesn't think or because he's retarded and is an asshole and that thinking that hes an ass for either of those is a GOOD thing. Way too many people think that the fact that someone didn't mean to do any harm means that disliking that about them is a bad thing. Hopefully she's decided to give him an earful if he ever asks her for help again.

If she's inclined to shrug it off it's different. Not to be callous but if she lets him keep doing this to her then it's as much her fault as it is his and at that point you either have to accept or move on to the petty. Find out how he's making his money in game and if you can destroy it or make it difficult for him *thumbs up* or something.

People who take advantage of other deserve someone to show them the meaning of the word consequences and your friend has first rights on doing that because it's her he was an ass too. Also, protecting your friend from the unpleasantness of this if she's going to keep making the same mistake with people isn't really helping her either.

[ItazuraNhomango]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

There are takers and givers... Each completes the other, to make us normal people feel indignant staring at the co-dependent pair? Maybe it's kinda like how abused children grow up looking for an abuser or victim as spouse? I dunno...

It's probably better than forging anger to mask jealousy at special treatment some slime gets because one who desperately clings to high moral grounds can never stoop to such manipulations or even allow oneself to take advantage of another's weakness...

Um... Yeah. Sorry, what were we talking about?

[Jei]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

Once the burn begins no one can stop mnk or war. Not entirely their fault that S-E decided to make their game this way and totally left smn and blm out in the blue.

[Omgwtfbbqkitten]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

It's not really any of your business, to be honest. So curse him out if you like, but since it's between the two of them, don't be surprised if you are told to butt out.

Its totally my business and here's why, another instance that involved him:

I once tracked Charbidys at request of my friend so we could help get this guy his Joyeuse for his COR. I was on disability, she had class, so I had no problem taking the time to track ToDs. My COR was also of the level to use Joyeuse and obtaining this was an interest to me as well. Quite frankly, I was of the opinion that since I did track the time I should have first dibs on drop, but I let him get it first anyway.

He swore up and down that he'd be there for the next pop to help get my Joytoy. Eight hours later the window is open for Charbydis and he's - surprise, surprise - doing Salvage and can't come, and it was a pick-up run at that. Luckily, my friend came as BRD and I got other friends to come as NIN and WAR to help out.

I got the drop, but still, its the principle of the thing - we could have not gotten claim and i'd be going without what I worked for. Fact is, he didn't keep his word. And like him or not, I would have come back to help had I gotten the drop first.

If somone does the work for you and busts their ass to help, you should make time to repay them. I'm still waiting.

Maybe I can convince my friend to shame him into helping with my BST AF3. Even if that wasn't the case, its my if you're not going to help me, help my friends and I'll call it even.

[Vyuru]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

There are some things you just can't do anything about. One of the best lessons that I have learned, and that I am still having trouble actually following through with, is if there is nothing you can do about it, why let it bother you?

People around where I live are horrible drivers, I try to keep a more or less 1 car/truck length per 10 MPH I drive, and I get flipped off for it, or people will honk/flash their lights. It doesn't matter that I am going the same speed as the car in front of me, people see the big space and want to do their 60 MPH on the other guy's ass.

Ya know, awhile ago I really wanted to get an Assault Jerkin for my drg, I get a few friends to come out with me, if I remember right both of them blew off a HNM event just for me. Or at least the HNM's spawn window had opened but he hadn't spawned yet, something like that. We get there, we're killing stuff, some other campers show up and it happens to be people we know, we may not be buddy buddies with them, but at least we know them, some of them were in a CoP static with my friends and I'd helped them all out alot down in the Crawler's Nest. I send them a /tell asking if they want to team up, no answer.

We get Ose, things go well then things go really badly, however we recover and it looks like we're going to win. Even at this point I asked if they wanted to team up, and got a REALLy rude response, from the person who's ass I saved like 8 times in the Nest no less, long story short we die, they kill Ose, they /point/laugh at us and call us noobs and in general are really rude.

Anything I can do about it? Nope, besides not helping/partying with any of those people ever again. I don't expect people to go out of their way to help me just because I've helped them, but I darn well expect some common courtesy from the people I've helped. I'd have been more than fine with a simple, "I'm sorry but no, your NM you deal with it" I just had to accept the fact that some people are asses and there is nothing I can do about it.

We get some raise IIIs from some other people, and I made my buds signed Heart Chocolates (it's a lvl 1 synth and I break 7 in a row and not one HQ!??!?!)

And yeah, I owe my friends alot, they have helped me out immensely. I still can't beleive how much help I have had and I would do almost anything for them, some of it I honestly don't think I could ever repay.

[Necropolis]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

I've come to the conclusion that helping people out will rarely, if ever, reap rewards for me.

I spend probably 90% of my time in-game helping people. Be it with LB1/2, rank, missions, various NMs, AF or other things. And I find that not expecting a single thing in return to be the biggest reward.

The most joy I get from in this game is when some one I don't know /tells me thanks for something I helped them with months ago that I had forgotten about. There are rare instances where they are able of helping me with something I need as well. For example a few days ago I get a /tell from some stranger, makes a comment about my name, and ask if I would like to do a Diabolos Prime fight as sometime. I respond that I need that fight as well, and turns out that I helped this guy get his LB1 items months ago, and was now a 75rdm/drk. So in the end it worked out. I got Diabolos, and he got LB1 and Diabolos.

But in the majority a lot of people only ask me for help with things, as opposed to asking if I need help with something. Most times I don't care, I enjoy helping, and I don't expect payment. Much easier and less stressful approaching it that way than any other.

[Horus]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

I know alot of people in FFXI, esecially my LS, who like to just help out other people as long as they're not doing anything important.
One girl I met in the Buburima Peninsula actually dropped her farming and helped me get Carbuncles Ruby (we were there for over 2 hours)
I met her the next RL day and she sent me a /tell asking to do the rank 2-3 BCNM mission. At once I agreed. I was still ony rank 1 so I left for Windy and began to do the missions. I'm now on mission 2-3 and I'm just waiting for her to return online so we can do it.

Guys like this MNK don't deserve to be helped. I find myself partying with the same people in different places (purely by accident) so word gets around of who you are and what you're like.
Hopefully word of this MNK will get around and he'll get what's coming to him.

[Murphie]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

Its totally my business and here's why, another instance that involved him:

I once tracked Charbidys at request of my friend so we could help get this guy his Joyeuse for his COR. I was on disability, she had class, so I had no problem taking the time to track ToDs. My COR was also of the level to use Joyeuse and obtaining this was an interest to me as well. Quite frankly, I was of the opinion that since I did track the time I should have first dibs on drop, but I let him get it first anyway.

He swore up and down that he'd be there for the next pop to help get my Joytoy. Eight hours later the window is open for Charbydis and he's - surprise, surprise - doing Salvage and can't come, and it was a pick-up run at that. Luckily, my friend came as BRD and I got other friends to come as NIN and WAR to help out.

I got the drop, but still, its the principle of the thing - we could have not gotten claim and i'd be going without what I worked for. Fact is, he didn't keep his word. And like him or not, I would have come back to help had I gotten the drop first.

If somone does the work for you and busts their ass to help, you should make time to repay them. I'm still waiting.

Maybe I can convince my friend to shame him into helping with my BST AF3. Even if that wasn't the case, its my if you're not going to help me, help my friends and I'll call it even.

No. Still not your business. This is between the two of them. If you feel that he owes you something, that's another issue altogether, but it has virtually nothing to do with what's going on with your other friend.

I get what you're saying, and I agree that what he's doing is pretty selfish, but seriously - not worth worrying about.

[BurningPanther]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

You just gotta hope that others will wise up to this guy's dead weight. It takes awhile, but eventually others will notice they are carrying this fella's load, while he sits pretty.

Really, though, you kind of contributed to the situation. You know his habits as a leech, but still you helped him get his Joyeuse. Granted, you were most directly helping out your WHM friend, but it came back around to him not being there.

You might have just told your WHM friend "no," maybe even tell her why not(she'll figure it out eventually), and let the whole situation sort itself out.

[LyonheartLakshmi]

Re: I just don't get this guy.

I would simply label the MNK in the OP as a level junkie. Some people are so hooked on leveling jobs that they won't pass up any chance to grind.

I remember trying to set up a Mission 3-3 run (the Delkfutt's Tower mission) in my LS, which had a lot of Rank 3 players waiting for an opportunity to hit Rank 4. We planned it ahead of time, worked with everyone to pick a time that would work for as many members as possible, advertised it in the /lsmes. And when the time came, at least 2 of the players we had counted on decided that staying with whatever exp party they had joined that day was more important.