How to leave a party without saying "This PT sucks?"

[Omgwtfbbqkitten]

I've had what one would probably call a chronic streak of fake disconnects lately. Its largely due to the fact that some of my PTs just aren't flowing like they should or I'm just too tired or annoyed to correct, give advice or bow out politely.

Had a Merit PT on Tuesday... if you could call it that. I'd call it a Valkurm PT.

Started out merely OK. SAM, NIN, RNG, BRD, WHM and me as COR.

BRD and I shared pulling duty and swiftly pulled in 3k. The NIN was ... AFKish, but we still managed to chain pretty well

Then the RNG, WHM and BRD had to leave. Gee, glad I came out.

And so, we find a RDM and SAM to replace and get a DRK/THF for DD. 30 minutes later we're rolling again.

Until the RDM begs me to stop pulling after chain #7, to which I replied ". . ."

What ensued from there was the AFK-ish NIN and the original SAM haveing a rather nasty argument with the RDM. Turns out the RDM and 2nd SAM were one of those romantic-couple package-deals where both use each other to get out of levelling other subjobs. RDM said she was a "sucky /WHM" which probably meant she didn't level a WHM sub at all. RDM girl and her loverboy SAM get pissed and leave.

So we find another RDM and another SAM. 20 minutes downtime this go-round.

Things picked back up though Caedarva Mire was now rather packed with people. 6k later disaster strikes and the RDM dies. DRK goes back to town to get WHM sub, SAM goes and changes to WHM. Actually didn't have too much of a problem with the DRK going /WHM since he was taru and we still has the other SAM for damage spike.

That was until our new SAM came back as WHM. I asked him if he just raising as WHM and coming back SAM. No, he's staying WHM. This wouldn't have been a problem so much if he had WHM gear, but he was naked and telling us "I'll just keep my distance."

And that's when I pulled the cable out of my PS2 and relogged into my taru to level BST again. Over two hours And I just almost made a merit, but I didn't care anymore.

I really wish I could find a nice way to disband PT sometimes. Maybe I just should do the traditional lie of "LS Event" but for some reason "power went out" or just not explaining myself feels better. I would use "I don't feel well," but I used that for three months last year when it was true.

[raidenn]

Re: How to leave a party without saying "This PT sucks?"

Just tell them you're going afk for awhile and not sure when you'll be back.

Sounds like everyone in your party has issues. It does happen a lot.

I remember being in a party with 2 SAMs who know each other and are so skillchain-happy that they were filling up the party chat with their 'tp ready' , 'weaponskill', 'skillchain commencing in 3 sec' , 'meditate-ready', '3rd eye' messages. Annoying when they have the <call> set too.
Once in awhile you get a drg who has a 'up, up and away!' set up on all his Jump macros.

I just told them I have to hit the town for some things I need to do and leave the party.

[ItazuraNhomango]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I don't have problem telling people:

"I don't think this party is working, and I'm leaving in 10 minutes unless we disband now. Sorry I won't be looking for a replacement; I wouldn't feel right to put another person in this group."

If it's true, just state it simply.

[Murphie]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I do (or rather, did) what Itazura does. I just tell them that the party isn't working and that I'm leaving. And I won't find a replacement, because I don't want to be mean to some random person.

[Akashimo]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

To me, the only polite thing these days are, fake d/c, disband without saying a word or say, "I'm not up for it." Then warp =3. Serious note, pties like that, generally makes me glad I rarely make parties just because I'm not good as a leader and I like to be focused on doing my job rather than semi focused on checking for reps and keeping track of time til someone has to go. Out of my 2 years 8 months playing, I can only recall kicking 2 people, one was for trying to MPK the party and the other, was being AFKish too much. Parties I've ditched, lets see, on whm, dieing from an unnesseray and avoidable link by someone not moving away from a mob that spawned(only person that could land sleep on the mob too...), another just last tuesday on rdm, party at Mire, yea, at 66, adds were killing us and almost all my enfeebles(including dispel) got resisted. Like, 6 deaths didn't tell the guy, these imps are too high for us, his response, "No we can take them, chain 5 500 exp we can get from here". The war, sam and me bailed after the last aggro that almost killed the war. >_>;

[LyonheartLakshmi]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I think it would be far better to disband / warp out / flat out tell them the honest truth rather than faking a d/c. If you fake a d/c, the party doesn't know whether or not you're coming back. You're likely saddling them with some down-time while they wait to see whether or not you come back. You might feel that one or two really bad players in your party deserve to have their time wasted, since they already wasted your time. But there's probably 2 to 4 other players in that party who are decent, hard working players who don't deserve that.

[BurningPanther]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I like telling a party why I'm leaving. It feels good not having to hide behind anything, it allows them to know where they stand with downtime, and if there are one or more bad players or situations, then they can never claim ignorance about what sucks, because I was upfront with them about it. If they fail to improve afterward, they can safely be labeled n00b.

[Celeal]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

tbh, I do really not like the EN party's replacement-in-mid-session style of exp. parties. I prefer the JP style that everyone in party disband at the same time once the party is over, no replacement unless for exceptional situations. No matter how good the party setup is at the begin, after a few replacement during the session, there is good chance for breaking the balance of the party.

I think a lot of those problem of "This PT sucks" would be gone if all the party members have the thinking of "party is precious, and lets get the most out of it in the limited amount of time."

If the party sucks, it simply sucks. There is no need to hide the fact that the party sucks. If I form a party and the party is unfortunately not working well, I will ask everyone's TNL in the party. If anyone in that party is close to next level, I would ask the party to wait until that person levels up, then disbanding party. If no one is close to level up, I would suggest for disbanding party when the food effect wears off (30 minutes at max).

I dislike ppl who Warp and disband in the middle of party, or fake d/c. It really lack of respect to others, as if the rest of the party does not exist or not a human being. Anyone has the right to leave a party (for whatever reason; it does not require any reason), just let the party knows before leaving, don't abandon the party w/o saying a word.

[ItazuraNhomango]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

Celeal: I wish we have more people like you on Ifrit. ^_^

[Kholdstare]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I'm not going to lie. It's a lot easier to say "I don't like this party, I'm leaving" when you aren't the kind of person that would beg for a party. Hell, a lot of times, if you're in-demand enough, you'll get people that bend over backwards so you DON'T leave. To say "You guys aren't living up to my expectations, I'm leaving" or even faking a d/c is very disrespectful and very primadonna. Really, In theory, Celeal's got it right. But, with TPburns and everyone getting the "it's a race" mentality, it's pretty sick what people will do for their "maximum" exp.

[Akashimo]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

tbh, I do really not like the EN party's replacement-in-mid-session style of exp. parties. I prefer the JP style that everyone in party disband at the same time once the party is over, no replacement unless for exceptional situations. No matter how good the party setup is at the begin, after a few replacement during the session, there is good chance for breaking the balance of the party.

I agree on this, most if not all JP parties I've had do it this way. Some of the most fun I've had on any job I leveled. Even a few parties when I wasn't lfp on thf or mnk

[Murphie]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I'm not going to lie. It's a lot easier to say "I don't like this party, I'm leaving" when you aren't the kind of person that would beg for a party. Hell, a lot of times, if you're in-demand enough, you'll get people that bend over backwards so you DON'T leave. To say "You guys aren't living up to my expectations, I'm leaving" or even faking a d/c is very disrespectful and very primadonna. Really, In theory, Celeal's got it right. But, with TPburns and everyone getting the "it's a race" mentality, it's pretty sick what people will do for their "maximum" exp.

No. To say "You guys aren't living up to my expecations, I'm leaving." is being honest. I'm not a prima donna for telling a party that things aren't working out. It's that kind of mentality that keeps people in miserable parties.

[DakAttack]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I say, "You guys rock! BBL"

[Theyaden]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I think a person has the right to anounce they are leaving if the pt does not work. However faking a dc is rude since party members may be being courtious and giving you up to 10 minutes to get back in. (Real dc's do happen). The only reason a person would be fake dcing is simply a lack of guts to tell the party I'm sorry pt is not working or I have to go.

My rule of thumb unless it really is an emergency is to give 15-20 minutes notice that I am leaving so that the pt lead can decide what kind of replacement he wants to find. Also I won't imediately leave on one bad pull since it could be the pt is bad or just bad luck as I was arriving. How the party plays out for the 1st ten minutes of grinding gives me a preaty good idea how things will flow and we all have different standards on what is workable there.

Note on add parties I don't mind pt's that replace members you sometimes end up with a less desirable setup, but I've had pt's that got better after a replacement due to removing a level gap or getting a more skilled player. (In some cases with a player that was not seeking when the party started) I've been in both types of party and never found one method to always trump to the other in effectiveness.

[Murphie]

Re: How to leave a party without saying &quot;This PT sucks?&quot;

I say, "You guys rock! BBL"

I should start using this one.