Feeling blah about the game

[Chemist]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Well put Hamlet. Now I can put my years of Buddist training to work in-game! ^_^

That guy was a douche, and he deserved whatever you called him. I know how you feel too, fighting with people can really turn a person off, but I'm usually feeling 100% after a good nap.

[nazlfrag]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Instead of just letting it go and blisting him, I let him get the better of me.

The fact you realised you let it get the better of you shows you are on top of the situation, at least now. We all lose our cool from time to time, it's only a problem if you don't recognize it.

Personally I like using the /point and /laugh emotes, it's better than a pointless verbal slinging match. If you argue with an idiot, he'll drag you down to his level and win on experience. So just laugh it off and forget it.

[Acira]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

I've had my share of these people and I've dealt my share of the stupid cards.

What I reccomend if you're feeling icky about the game is take a few days off, take some breaths, catch some rest you probably missed :p, I personally like to read a little bit when I've had a stressful gaming experience. I've done those things and I've came back to the game feeling alot better than when I left

The best advice would be of course to ignore them. But I can understand if you're not feeling yourself and another has pushed you to your limit.

Just relax and realize that no matter where you are, no matter what you do, there will always be players that have an immaturity absolute.

[Aeni]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

So now I get all emo about it. I think about all the times some butthole has said something to me like that in the game over nothing and it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I really feel blah about the game now. I still have a few things I want to do, but just thinking about the game now makes me ill. Should I maybe just take a break? I shouldn't have let the guy get to me, but seeing as it was so easy for him to push my buttons, maybe I've just been playing too much. Or maybe I have issues, I dunno.

You get a kitty hug from me.

I think I would've responded a lot worse than you, but anywho ... which is why I don't go /check people. Think that topic got beaten to death, but I'd prefer to leave the confrontation at the front door and not have to deal with it.

At the very least you should add him to your /blist. Man, that's one angry midget you ran into. Think he was suffering from his obssession with his physical deformity and took it out on you. Tarus can be mean like that...

[Grizzlebeard]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

As Feba correctly pointed out:

[The_Hero]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

"Better to let go then let loose" - Some smart guy

[Bricklayer]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Retardtaru>> What the hell are you looking at you skank?

Definite overreaction by this guy... like the fake nick you gave him

As for your own emotions, here's a tool I learned in a class at my church (Taipei Truth Lutheran Church, the tool was not developed by the church though):

Activating Event - What happened to set off the emotional response?
Belief - What belief(s) contributed to the emotional response?
Consequence - What was the emotional response?
Dispute - What might be wrong with your belief?

The real key to "cognitive intervention" is combatting the belief that got you to the consequence in the first place. Usually, the best way to do this analysis is to start with the activator (retardtaru calling you a "skank" or retardtaru getting angry at you for /checking him, maybe both) and the consequence (anger, frustration, engaging in an insult match with retardtaru), then moving to the belief that made you feel the way you did when the activating event occurred. Once you know why you feel the way you do, you can evaluate your belief to see if its rational, and change it if you realize you were wrong to think that way.

Enjoy!

[Grizzlebeard]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Or you could just report him to a GM for offensive language and promptly put him on ignore.

[Hamlet]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Well put Hamlet. Now I can put my years of Buddist training to work in-game!

Well, you don't have to join a monestary or anything, but I've had friends who meditated daily and swear by it, and I've read some books by the Dali Lama and they're great (he's a really good writer as well as teacher). But I think I'm far too western to meditate right, because I've never been able to get to 4 or 5 really.

As for your own emotions, here's a tool I learned in a class at my church (Taipei Truth Lutheran Church, the tool was not developed by the church though):

Activating Event - What happened to set off the emotional response?
Belief - What belief(s) contributed to the emotional response?
Consequence - What was the emotional response?
Dispute - What might be wrong with your belief?

The real key to "cognitive intervention" is combatting the belief that got you to the consequence in the first place. Usually, the best way to do this analysis is to start with the activator (retardtaru calling you a "skank" or retardtaru getting angry at you for /checking him, maybe both) and the consequence (anger, frustration, engaging in an insult match with retardtaru), then moving to the belief that made you feel the way you did when the activating event occurred. Once you know why you feel the way you do, you can evaluate your belief to see if its rational, and change it if you realize you were wrong to think that way.

Enjoy!

That's the basis for cognitive therapy, which says that all emotions are directly caused by your thoughts (which I think is almost definately true). I'm surprised that they're teaching it in church, although I'm Roman Catholic which is probably alot different than "Taipei Truth Lutheran Church".

[Lasswyn]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Yep, I've been where you are now. I know, it's hell. A year ago, some random Hume ran past me in Ronfaure and sent me a /tell calling me ugly. I couldn't wrap my head around that--it's a pixelated avatar! What difference should it make to you if I'm wearing bronze gear and my hair's up in braids? Oh, I'm so SORRY my fake persona isn't sexy enough for your liking, O Great Hume of Uberness!

...we got into it pretty bad in /tells. And the madder I got at his twisted logic, the funnier he thought it was. He even got his brother in on it, who was in another zone and couldn't even SEE me, calling me ugly again. I know now that I should never have let the guy know that what he said genuinely hurt me, because I went through life with low self-esteem once already, and I didn't expect to be doing it a second time online. If I'd ignored him, he never would've known whether I even spoke English or not, which is the greatest escape hatch of all time.

The correct response? "If you don't like what you see, maybe you should download that Richard Simmons dat and paste it overtop of my character. I hear your type really goes for that."

Your two most valuable weapons are a) ignoring them, and b) out-smartassing them. And even if they get under your skin and you can't seem to fight back, know that the Karma fairies are watching--that guy who insulted me for no reason was perma-banned a couple months back for multiple offences, and I didn't even report him myself. Your TaruTurd guy is probably programmed to self-destruct someday in the same manner.

Meanwhile, take a week off. Put your feet up. Sip some margaritas. Come back refreshed.

[Asir]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

When dealing with people like Retardtaru, I have 2 moods only; Generous or PMS.

Generous: {I don't speak any English.} {Please use auto translate function.}

PMS: Well... It can get rather ugly. While they're using their childish insults, I use intelligence to turn it all around and end up insulting them without saying a single thing that can get me in trouble with the GMs. Although there are those days when I do stoop to their level... Only human after all.

Don't let it get to you, we all have our days where we blow up at someone.

[Bricklayer]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

That's the basis for cognitive therapy, which says that all emotions are directly caused by your thoughts (which I think is almost definately true). I'm surprised that they're teaching it in church, although I'm Roman Catholic which is probably alot different than "Taipei Truth Lutheran Church".

Yea, one of the primary missionaries who helped build this church had his degree in psychology from Purdue. But that's beside the point...

I can think of a number of examples from the Pauline epistles and the gospels that would support the use of cognitive psychology (at least the basics), including Romans 12:2 ("...be transformed by the renewing of your mind"), John 8:32 ("and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free"), and Galatians 5:22-23 ("But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control"). In a nutshell, if Satan is constantly telling us lies, one of our greatest tools to combat the lies that have already become part of our value system is cognitive psychology, or disruption of the irrational thoughts we have.

So, bringing this back to FF, if someone said something like that to me, I'd probably think, "What a dork..." That guy should feel flattered that someone would actually take enough interest in him to /check him. Further, how could he possibly make a judgement that I was a skank based on something that everyone and their mom does on a fairly regular basis? I guess my belief would be something like: "Hmm, retardtaru really doesn't like being /checked... guess I won't ever /check him again if he's so sensitive about it..." Then, I'd copy the chat to a GM, I suppose. That's pretty inappropriate language.

[Hamlet]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Then, I'd copy the chat to a GM, I suppose. That's pretty inappropriate language.

That's the other thing. My advice is good for rl, and for the game really, but it IS a game, with rules that can be enforced (unlike real life), and one of them is you don't have to take crap like this from anybody if you don't want to. This option gets voided if you chose to insult back, however.

[The_Hero]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

yea I agree.
People online think they can just waltz in and swear at anyone for nothing really, these people seriously need therapy or maybe they're being bullied in real life and decide "oh let's bully ppl online 'cause we're weak little losers and ppl can't see us online or do anything to us".
God I hate ppl like that, why can't everyone just get along and stuff. And Nanatsu + others in situation, I think u's were great staying your ground at least and not taking crap from these nerds, as in my opinion just let it go you shouldn't get all wild because of some stooge is hassling you, "the universe tends to unfold as it should" - Harold hahahaha it actually works lol.

[nanatsu]

Re: Feeling blah about the game

Well I did take some of the advice offered and pulled a way for a bit and did something else for a while. It was a nice change of pace to be honest. But! I did log on and happen to see him. I checked him repeatedly for about 30 times, then blisted him, and then logged off to continue pulling away from the game for a bit. I plan to only go on to turn in items for guild points for a little while. I feel like I can find time now to do other things I've wanted to do and that's good. I still plan on going back to the game a lot more later on, but I think a break is going to be nice.