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  • Comment On This Plz

    This Is The Story Of How Rylios Came To Be In The Town Of San' Doria..

    The story begins while the war between good and evil was going on in Vana ‘Diel. While fighting off the Evil that was lurking the mystical world many died to protecting it. Many children lost their mother and fathers; some were wounded very badly. On a calm day after things settled down but not vanished a curious little boy was crying, running around looking for his father. He ran everywhere looking every inch of the town for his father. Soon to realize he was no where to be found, He starts to run no destination just where his feet take him. He realizes that he is no longer in the town Of San’ Doria, But in the woods and soon was lost. Struggling to find his way back he comes upon a hill where he can see the body of his Father, his father barely breathing says to him “You must protect… this world…from any evil... not because I told you to but because its your duty...” As the young boy starts to cry again his fathers with his final breathe says “Rylios… you must be strong and help restore the peace there once was... avenge your fellow people…”
    And as his father passes on; Rylios Screams “Father!!!” and the story begins as Rylios awakes In the town of San’ Doria


    Ps. Forgive If I Made Any Mistakes
    Comments are welcome
    Owner of MiseryKnights ~
    We Live As One, We Die As One

  • #2
    Cool! Nice Elvaan avatar BTW, looks cool too...

    ^.^

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    • #3
      Thanks Much
      Owner of MiseryKnights ~
      We Live As One, We Die As One

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      • #4
        Interesting! I would like to read the rest of the story...

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        • #5
          well i wrote it like that so when i get the game the my adventure would begin where i left off and i would meake a journal about it.. weird i guess
          Owner of MiseryKnights ~
          We Live As One, We Die As One

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          • #6
            Hey Nice Story So Far, Hope To Hear The Rest sometime

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            • #7
              whats with you guys capitalizing so much? i don't know if you are doing this for some sort of added affect but it distracts the reader from paying attention. also, good, evil, blah, cliche. throw some unique aspects into this story to make it stand out from the others, like make the antagonist win, or something along those lines

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              • #8
                Lol yeh, with those capitalizations I was reading every-word-like-this-over-and-over-blah-blah-blah.

                ---------------
                What is forgotten is forever immortal

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                • #9
                  Sorry Bout that i have a habit of that let me change it asap
                  Originally posted by Andarvi
                  whats with you guys capitalizing so much? i don't know if you are doing this for some sort of added affect but it distracts the reader from paying attention. also, good, evil, blah, cliche. throw some unique aspects into this story to make it stand out from the others, like make the antagonist win, or something along those lines
                  Well The Story Of FFXI is against Evil but its basically what i'm doing is givin you how Rylios( Me ) came to be and why i'm fighting the evil or whatever you wanna call it.. but the rest of the story will begin the first day i log on to FFXI server
                  Owner of MiseryKnights ~
                  We Live As One, We Die As One

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                  • #10
                    Sounds interesting - write that journal and I'll be sure to read it!

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                    • #11
                      If your writing a story dont be led to use in game terminology, otherwise it just looks like your writing the blurb for the back of a computer game box.

                      Also use commas more often, you use lots of full stops which lend a certain STOP-START feel to it.
                      Hoppkins - Red Mage - Ragnarok
                      Hopkins - Theif - Ragnarok - RIP
                      Hoppkins Wytchfinder lv 70 Cleric Emarr Server

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