The Journal of Lanih

[Lanih]

I'm sorry but I really think this'll be the end of Lanih's story for now. Things are hectic at school, so I can't play at all during weekdays. Weekends I sleep. The little free time I have I'd rather spend fishing and relaxing than stressing about leveling and doing missions. And that's what I'm going to do for now. I don't have time nor energy to keep this thing updated, plus the updates would be really boring if I just fish. My inspiration is still alive though and I have no plans on forgetting Lanih's story totally. I will continue this someday, when I have more time.

I'll probably post some random pics and updates every now and then but the story will be on hold for now.

And just to throw you something, I actually did a couple of missions and got to rank 3. Not in Windurst though. Bastok. I had this major twist already pre-written but seems like I never have the patience to concentrate on writing instead of playing... But you'd do the same if you had only a couple of hours playtime per week ; ;

Anyways, to clear things up; I'll not be gone forever. I'm just taking a break.

Thanks for your understanding ^^~

(Actually, now that I think of it, it's a good thing to put the story on hold for now, cause I need some time to level certain jobs. Doesn't sound very good if Semih Lafihna's skills are challenged by a lv8 RNG, eh? ;D The scene where Semih and Lanih are finally at the same point will come eventually... but I can't stretch the story much longer anymore, so I better jam it for a while I still have an ending-kind of thing to this first part of Lanih's story and I will post it later on today.)

[Angelhelix]

Ok. Good luck with school work.

[Lanih]

I went to see the guards at the Windurst Woods gate to accept a mission, but they said Semih had requested me to see her before that. In other words, they wouldn't give me a mission until I'd talked with her. I went to Walls, hoping to run into Semih and as I had suspected, she was waiting for me near Yoran-Oran's house. We walked around Walls and talked. 'Your newfound interrrest in doing missions for ourrr beautiful federation is giving me a headache...' Semih seemed to be wanting to talk seriously now, so I just decided to listen what she had to say. 'Windurrrst is about to enter a conflict farrr beyond your powers. I don't want you to get involved with this just yet, you need some serious trrraining before that.' She seemed a bit nervous. 'What I'm trrrying to say is... You need to get out of here. Out of Windurrrst.' I was pretty shocked. I had always thought Semih would want me to stay. I thought I'd be the one to... 'No. You're too weak forrr that. Did you really think you would be able to challenge my skills after a few months of trrraining?' Semih laughed. Not arrogantly, though. I think she was getting pretty relaxed now. After a few minutes of mindless chitchat, she became quiet and nervous again. 'There's one thing you should know... The reason I want you to leave the city is perrrsonal. I... Ehh...' She was getting frustrated and I think I heard her voice cracking a few times when she just blurted the next sentence out. 'Lanih... I prrromised your dying motherrr that I'd take care of you! I was supposed to returrrn to Windurst with you and take you with me to train as a ranger, so that we could prrrotect Windurst together someday... I would treat you as a sister and you'd learn all about the old times, the mithrrra coming to Windurst, the Great War, and your family...' I was pretty shocked now. 'But then you went missing. I searched for you for months, vut there was no trrrace of you whatsoever. I gave up, I thought you got killed. I was really angry to myself for betrrraying yourrr mother... Then, when you suddenly just pop back a few years later... You have to understand I was pretty out of my mind for a while there.' Semih was quiet for a while, giving me some time to think about what I had just heard. The puzzle started to make some sense, finally. There are still holes in it I can't figure out, but it's getting more clear. We went to Woods and I said I'd go to sleep. 'Wait. You obviously missed my point...' Semih was her old, usual, cold self. 'You have to leave Windurrrst, as soon as possible. Forget Windurrrst and go train somewhere else. It's not safe for you here anymore. Come back when you're strrrong enough so I won't have to watch overrr you during combat...' And she walked away. Leaving me speechless, as usual.

According to Semih's story, I'd probably get myself killed if I stayed in Windurst. I didn't know why, though. I think she was still hiding something. Anyways, I decided to leave. I always liked travelling, so I thought it would be no problem to travel around the world for a while. But first, I'd go to Kazham and spend some time with my little sister. Physical training and travelling will come later, now I just need some time to think.

[OOC: As I said, the story ends for now. ^^]

[Lanih]

I'm all NIN nowadays ^^ Still planning to go RNG someday, but I just can't level both of them simultaneously; too expensive :sweat: So I'll lvl NIN to at least 37 before RNG... Though right now I feel like I could go all the way to 75 with NIN xD; I'm really starting to like blinktanking ^^

Here's a pic of teh newbie NIN xD

[Lanih]

I just hit my first bad no-money -period yesterday xP Currently, I have nothing for sale in the AH, and I have no cash. I farmed for Beehive Chips on Zegham Hill [blessed things goo for 4k/stack in Bastok ^_^] and got a little money for helping some Bastokers by doing quests for them. My favourite one is the Soot-collecting in Zeruhn. I get my low-level jobs trained to 8 there if I want and get some nice money while doing that too I burned it all for Shihei, lol, so I gotta do it again today ^_^;

You might be wondering what am I doing in Bastok... The thing is, my little sister [You remember Nhae from my first Kazham-visit, right?] wasn't home when I went to see her. Someone told me she had left from the village to Bastok, to train herself to become a warrior. I was pretty shocked when I heard that.. Anyways, I went to Bastok immediately and found her from Zeruhn. She was training there and she told me she's a citizen of Bastok now. I knew she had no choice but to become one since once you leave Kazham to go on an adventure, you're not welcomed back. I could see she tried to look brave but for real she must've felt very lonely there. So I stayed, simple as that (:

Anyways, all of my money goes to the Ninjutsu-tools so I can't help her financially, lol, but she does appreciate my staying. I'm really starting to like Bastok, too. The Tenshodo-branch here makes my life a lot easier, plus I feel homely cause of the other ninja's. And I like Cid He has sent me to do all kinds of stuff already. I'm a Certified Adventurer nowadays, and it's mostly thanks to him and his run-there-and-do-this-and-that missions ^_^

The only place I could ever call home would most likely be Norg. I can feel a strange kind of vibe in the air there, haha. It must sound weird, but... The place smells like home. I remember the smell of saltwater and old barrels from somewhere. I now know I was raised in Kazham, but no-one ever told me where I was born...

[Lanih]

(OOC:

Oookay... I think I better announce this here, too. Lanih is getting retired :/

When I first heard of FFXI, I wanted to be an Elvaan. When I got the game, my first character was an Elvaan. I was a THF then, and something made me delete my char and start again as a Mithra cause I would be a 'better' THF if I was a Mithra. People told me not to change, cause if I choose my race to fit the job I want, things'll get ugly and I'd most likely regret it afterwards. I said 'nah, I'll love THF now and forever !'... But that is just what happened ; ;

After I hit lv30 and discovered the fun in jobs like Dark Knight, Ninja and Paladin, my love for the THF kind of withered away. Meaning, playing as a Mithra didn't feel good anymore.

I've always said to newbie-players that the freedom of choice is one of the greatest things in this game and you should just pick whatever race you want and choose job later... Still I blindly did the mistake of choosing my race after a job myself <_< I have nothing against Mithra's, but... you could say; once an Elvaan, always an Elvaan.

I don't have the heart to delete Lanih entirely, so she'll stay as my mule-character. And if for some reason I want to play as her again someday, she'll be there waiting. But I doubt that time will come anytime soon.

Thanks for everyone who commented on this journal, it was really encouraging to see that my writing-skills haven't gotten too rusty during the last couple of years of not writing anything ^_^; I might start a new journal for my Elvaan, but I'm not so sure if I want to start it right from the beginning... I love to take screenshots though so I might just start one to post screenies and maybe write a couple of sentences... But don't expect anything too epic just yet

Again, thank you everyone for your support! ^_^)

/bow
/goodbye

[Lanih]

OK, feels a bit weird to spam my own thread like this, lol, but... I'm in a strange stage with my FFXI now. I don't know if I want to continue playing as Lanih or if I want to start again as an Elvaan. For now, I'm playing as whoever I feel like playing at the moment.

I think I'm too attached to Lanih to give up playing as her, so I might just continue xD Honestly, I don't know what I want to do right now, but I'm sure time will tell ^_^.

[Angelhelix]

Go with your heart.

[Lanih]

Originally posted by Angelhelix
Go with your heart.

In the end, that's just what I did ^_^

My identity-crisis in FFXI is now over. I thought about different options and I even 'started over'... After a few days I realized that, well, I'm Lanih ^^ When playing with the other characters, I always felt like I was exping my mule. It took me a while to realize that a mithra is what I want to be. One of the biggest things I missed when playing as a hume or elvaan was the fact that mithras twitch their ears in the battle :D Such a simple little thing and still it got me thinking again. And now I've done my thinking and decided to follow my heart, which has grown to love the little white-haired mithran marauder

I'm re-starting another thing, too; my career as a THF. I read some stuff about lockpicking and coffer/chest-hunting and now I can't wait to be lv50~ to be able to do that [could do it earlier, but at lv50 I can sub a lv25whm so I have sneak/invis ^^] Of course, you can't forget the great fuidama I'm actually just a little bit afraid on how I will succeed in landing my fui's... But I'm counting on the fact that everyone's a little lost when they first go over lv30, because that's when the jobs really start to differ from each other. So I hopefully won't get booted if I mess up fui a couple of times in the beginning

I've spent the last few days farming and such, since I needed to buy my THF-gear. I'm almost done now, only missing my Federation Knife and Spike Necklace

I'll start posting updates again [every once in a while at least]. The story is still on hold because I really wanna concentrate on farming and exping now, so the updates will mostly consist of pictures with some descriptive babble, haha.

So, yeah... happy halloween! ^_^

[Lanih]

Is it just me or is it always this slow to find a party in Altepa? ; ; I wanted to boost through 30-40 as quickly as possible but seems like this'll take ages to get out of Rabao... (/cry) Only one level so far <_<

[Angelhelix]

Welcome Back. ^_^

[Lanih]

Originally posted by Angelhelix
Welcome Back. ^_^

Thanks! ^^ (/bow)



More Altepa-fun today... I reached the point I've been a bit afraid of; Lv33 and Viper Bite.

I was afraid that I can't connect SATA+VB and to be honest I haven't done it succesfull yet ; ; I hit my SATA-macro, engage the mob and start bashing my VB macro like crazy, buuuut I end up hitting the mob once, thus unloading SATA and busting VB after that <_< I've only tried it for like 4 times though, so I guess I was just unlucky. Stressing like hell doesn't make it any easier, lol. I think I should just calm down a bit... If it misses, it misses. Everyone misses sometimes, yes? I just hope I'll learn to do it properly sometime soon

Tanks that don't know how to stand still won't help me with this either >< I hope I could get into a good party tomorrow, one where everyone would know what to do and where to stand. It would make my practicing a lot easier. (/sigh)

[Rosiel]

Hey, Lan, didn't see you in the game for a while (I am not on that much nowadays, and I am bored now, but I don't really want to log on, because I am kinda sleepy now)

Some advice on your SATA + VB, you can set 1 macro to do the whole thing, just need to test the delay, and wait time, then you won't need to worry about missing it in the future, let the computer do its work

At the early lv30s, many ppl are still haven't realize how nice it is to have a THF in the pt. (consider the dmg, and the drop rate, THF is uber) But it will get better and better, THF is always on my list if I want to pt

[Lanih]

OOC:

Hiya. I don't know why I'm writing this here, but I just feel like getting all of this written down. And since this is my journal I guess I can do this.

I quit the game a couple of weeks before Christmas. The whole thing started to feel so mechanical; exping, exping and more exping. So I quit. I was just about to cancel my account when my cousin said that I shouldn't do it. That I should wait for a month or so and then cancel the account if I'd still be sure about this. So I let it be.

Lots of stuff happened before I quit. I was invited to join the Leviathan-server, because there are a lot of Finnish people there so me and my cousin wouldn't have to play alone anymore [the time differences suck :/]. So we switched servers... I had to delete Lanih because I needed the slot for my new mule on Leviathan. But things weren't the same. I started to grow bored of the game already and starting over didn't really help... The people in Leviathan were nice and all, but... It just didn't feel right. I decided to quit then. Well, after over a month of not playing, my cousin told me that he had switched back to Garuda and asked if I'd wanna come check out his new character. I wasn't too enthusiastic about it, but a couple of weeks later I decided to create a character just to go check on my cousin. I started feeling like playing again, because being new reminded me about all the wonderful things the game has to offer; it's not just exping, it never was. You just can't let yourself forget that, if you wanna keep on playing. Anyways, I started to feel so depressed about deleting Lanih >_<; It didn't matter that much earlier, cause we changed servers so it was inevitable at that time, but now that we were back on Garuda... I have to admit I almost cried >_<; I'd have to start it all over again.

Right now I have this weird love/hate relationship with the game. I love it, all the things it has to offer, all the people I've met and you know. Everything. But it's so depressing to wade through the early levels again. I've started to feel a bit better after I got my cooking back up to lv40'ish.. That's where my original char had it too. I miss my lv37 fishing like crazy ;_; But I think I'll get it back eventually, especially with the new fishing-change. The highest job on the original char was only lv34 THF so it's not that hard for me to get all that back, but all the quests, adventures and memories aren't so easily regained.

I'm starting to get over this. Lanih is a lv18 BLM and a lv9 RDM, I'm planning to take RDM to lv30 and then start working on my WAR, PLD and NIN. Sometimes I just can't bother to play, because it hurts quite a bit to do it all over again, but I know I won't achieve anything by just sulking.

So I'm getting back there, slowly but surely.

I wanted to let this thing out of my chest here, because 99% of the people who read my real journal have no idea how I feel since they don't play FFXI.

I intend to get at least one of my jobs to lv30 before the first anniversary of this journal. It wouldn't be a hard thing to do if my playing-motivation wasn't in healing mode, but right now I don't know how long it'll take for this feeling to go away.

If someone got this far, thanks for reading ^^ You don't need to reply, I'm just glad if someone reads this. Because I'm sure other people have been through this too, more or less the same way, and probably even worse.

[Drawmuh]

XD I did the same exact thing as you did and I seriously quit because I too was feeling the exping grind... but then I came back after a break just to talk and hang out with friends and now I find myself enjoying the game again =)